DRUNKEN DIALING

You have done drunk dialing right.....Stop acting like you have never drunk dialed your ex in the wee hours with or without your caller ID on. I know i have, i kept calling and asking if he could over or crying about how i miss him and all that nonsense desperate single people do after drinking then it suddenly hits you that you will die alone and miserable before daylight.

 
Valentines day is around the corner and im very afraid for everyone who is single. I know most of us will be miserable and make that call or send that text when drunk
Text 1: Where are you? can you come over? 
Text 2: Im so sad we arent together
Text 3: Please come for a drink, i hate drinking without you
Text 4: I have something urgent to tell you, please call me
Text 5: Why are you not replying back
Text 6: ??????? why
*nude photo sent*
 

Women who drunk dial are the worst, one friend of mine would send mass texts to her ex, workmates, ex boss, cab driver and everyone else in her phone book until one day she sent her cousin a naked pic and she had to make that call of shame.

So to survive drunken dialing this valentines day , here are some of my rules that should help you go through the night.

Ask a girl friend or male friend to stay over
Delete all the numbers you dont need in your phone book
Make all the calls you need to make before you start drinking
Give your friend the phone and you take theirs
Do not use your friends phone to dial your ex number stuck in your head
Put off the phone or ask your friend to lock your phone for the evening with a different password
Collect all the bad memories around your house and burn them outside
Sing kumbaya till the morning in drunken bliss
Do not post anything in any social media until three days after valentines
Phew! you will survive another year.

Keep it 100%

Miss Di