THE PROPOSAL

I could see that he was excited and scared at the same time, he gave me the box and I opened it, there lay the most beautiful ring I had ever seen, that moment I felt like crying but I took one deep breath and I said that it was beautiful. He was glad that I approved and I looked at it closer to see the sparkle.....there it was.... glinting back into my eyes.

You have no idea how scared I am he said to me, I asked him why and he says that he wasn't sure whether it was the right time, he didn't know whether he would get a yes or no, he had no idea where he would actually propose.

I looked straight at him and I started throwing at him some interesting ideas. A picnic would be amazing or a dinner just the two or with friends? what if she said no in front of friends, what about at church since she is religious, nahhh too fruity.

I watched him continue to ponder with other ideas, he told me how nerve wrecking it was for him to have decided to make that decision of buying the ring, yes she had been hinting for a long time about it and he decided it was time.

I silently slipped into my own world and wondered, will I ever get that ring? shall a man somewhere have butterflies because he doesn't know how he will propose? Looking back... all I got was calls in the middle of the night with a drunken voice declaring love for me or a threat of how we should do something about our relationship. Huh! Life is indeed strange. Some of us get the actual proposal while some get the ring after being knocked up or some weird circumstance. Does the woman actually push the man into getting that rock?

If I ever get that proposal, he better come riding a white horse, sweep me off to the private jet waiting to take me to Jacob the jeweller in New York....for me to custom make my own ring with different cuts of diamonds, gold, platinum and pearls. He better propose at the Ritz in Paris at the presidential suite with private services of a chef, waiter and a Latino man singing all my favourites in opera style, he can have a billboard outside the hotel written WILL YOU MARRY ME! then with the finale of a flash mob, TOOO MUCH?? 

Go figure why im still waiting

Miss Di

COUGAR INTERNATIONAL CRUISE

So here I am thinking about of places I could go on holiday, with a swimming pool, remember I haven't gone dipping in my birthday suit and I haven't gone out of the country for two weeks according to my bucket list??

Well.... while I was checking out various place to holiday I got a very interesting site.

A TWO WEEK CRUSIE FOR COUGARS! Yup, I was also stunned! in an interesting way.


Here is where I put my disclaimer: I DO NOT FANCY YOUNGER MEN, THEY FANCY ME.

Cougar cruises take place aboard a large, commercial ship alongside thousands of other non-cougar vacationers. The hosts bring cougars and cubs together during meals, daytime excursions and night-time activities, like bar hopping and Jacuzzi parties (hmmm im smiling). According to owners of the cruise, the cubs say they like the older women because they know what they want and they don’t play games. A lot of cubs really don’t like the young women they date -– too much game playing and immaturity (hahahhaha)   It’s not like when guys are pursuing younger women or women their age. The dynamics change a little bit, and these are older women who are probably more secure and more confident, but also maybe more desperate, (hahaha desperate...not me thank you very much)

Well as I get older the boys chasing after me keep getting younger and those young gentlemen are..... uhmmm....I don't have the words to describe them. Now you can shake your head from here.

Yes I have been a cougar and I would never recommend it to any mature girls, Yes, Yeah.... you get all the attention, the nice sweet words and loving but honestly, younger boys bore me. All they want  to do is get high and have sex.... who needs that?..... Taking care of a drunk boy, partying till 3am in the morning from Friday to Friday....note... in a local bar with he's 'boys' ....getting into bar fights for no reason or  because someone touched you or because someone spoke to you.. Too much drama! the dancehall music is great but the grinding, dirty whining..... just play me a nice dancehall tune in a nice restaurant where I can shake my booty and imagine myself whining on the seat!!! thank you very much!!!!.

Ohhhh try breaking up with the cubs, Lawd! Molly! the depression they undergo is too tasking,... while I was in cougarville I learnt the following, if you are going to go out with a cub, he probably didn't have a mother figure around him or he was very tight with he's mother, so the cougar is replacing the mum who they give all the loving, attention, just like mummies but with sex as a bonus. Cubs try to act like grown up men but that is just an act, they haven't matured to the level of a grown ass man ....so if you need someone to upgrade you, well honey cougar, you will be paying all the bills, picking up he's shit and guess what, you are never the only one in his life, you are just a stepping stone to the real younger love of  his miserable lying ass.

If you are a cougar out there, tuck in your sagging tittes into a victory secret bra (not Victoria), pack your three dildos, your one piece costume, wrinkle night cream, sexy heels and sign up for the Cougar International cruise with me. Hey! im still down for the cruise. We can get those cubs to dance to that dancehall, hip hop music they like so much on the cruise and we pay them in 50's, ahh... the trip goes to Jamaica, I cant wait to get off the ship, meet an island grown up man when we land in Jamaica, now that's where the real fun begins, I heard the island dem rich bombaclut, Afta tree nah grow inna mi face? Di fus wata hog pass him wash himself.

I WILL BE BACK WITH STORIES FROM JAMAICA, MY DREDLOCK RASTTAaaa
                                                                 
 MISS COUGAR DI
 

I WANT ME A BABY DADDY

 Yes, you read right! And yes im rolling my eyes back at you!

I was on my bed this morning and I wished that I had  patter of feet running to my bed, to wake me up with tiny kisses, the mixture of baby smell and baby morning breathe after sleeping with a bottle of milk in the little babies mouth..... the look of excitement in their little angelic eyes as they stare at you with glee and love. I love the way a baby can fall asleep in your arms knowing it will be secure and no one can harm it.

Then I got to work and a site had posted that photo of my dream guy and a child and I thought to myself...... that is my baby daddy right there and our daughter, hey!!!!! allow me to dream.

So back to earth now I stared toying with the idea of getting a baby daddy, someone to place the seed and then could be dismissed or he wouldn't have to know about it.

I know its hard being a single mother and a child not having a daddy around but I figure... that if im still childless at the moment and if I planned ahead in the few months maybe in 2014, I could have my baby, probably plan for one at the mid year? Sounds crazy but hey I know ladies you want a child just like me and im not one to preach about having a stable family but its good to have that one thing you truly cherish.

Maybe im blind sided at the moment but I would love to have my Michael or Michel'le ....yes I have picked up names for them.

So if you see my baby daddy out there *cough*drake*cough* let him know that we need to make some plans in May- June 2014.....

Miss Di

SLEPT UNDER THE STARS

Second on my bucket list reads that I would love to sleep under the stars, I think I got to get this part done in the past weekend.

I went for an after party and I met this guy I knew ages ago, the first time we met he was just an ordinary guy looking for a job as a singer and performer, he kept nagging me to be placed even at the end of a show I was organizing and I granted he's wish. From that performance he's carrier took off and he become a star.

He looked better than I remember and he kept on thanking me for the opportunity 8 years ago and asked if he could buy me a drink after the show. I was with my girlfriends and couldn't ditch them and asked him to come to a hot club down the strip.

It felt like walking down memory lane at that club, I met so many people from my past and the hugs sometimes got abit uncomfortable. I met an ex who clung on to me most of the night and a friend who tried to be a 'guy friend' which didn't work. Everyone who was just a beginner in life back then had become something of themselves and most had added a kilo or two.

Mr Performer finally shows up and I pretend not to have see him, watched the way he kept dialing angrily on he's phone while frantically walking around the club. I stood and walked outside to where the balcony, found my ex boyfriend and my guy friend chatting, I went right between them, men being men, put their arms around me just in time for Mr perform to come and grab my hand, he pulled me away from the guys and asked me to walk downstairs with him. For a moment I felt like pretty woman being rescued. I walked outside with him to he's car and he was kind enough to force me into the car. He popped open a bottle of wine and actually had glasses, pushed my car back, we sipped on the wine as we spoke.

He really was sweet brushing strands from my face, holding my hand and occasionally placing he's hand on my legs. We just lay there watching the skies filled with stars as the night become colder and the wine refused to warm our bodies, it numbed mine instead.

I was wandering why he wasn't pulling any moves considering the morning light had started to appear, he had been listening to me go on about how my life was and finally he played a song he had worked on a long time ago and he never could release it.

The song was a simple melody of how life makes you make choices, some good and some bad, the rain would never rain on he's parade no matter where he went even though he would never be at peace with what he was fighting in he's head. He lost and found but what he found was because of a choices he made.

I absolutely loved the song, I asked him whether I could keep It, he removed the cd and signed it unreleased with love for Diana.

He told me that the song was written for me and he had one day wanted to play it for me, he had wanted to release it so that I could hear it but he wanted it to be between me and him. He had tried getting in touch with me but I kept ignoring him and never took him seriously.

I was really touched, put back the cd and listened to it again, my heart broke when I listened more carefully, there is a part of the song that he says the name he used to call me years ago and I knew it was just another tune, it was meant for me.

I looked up into the sky, tears nearly coming down in torrents and watched the last shimmers of the morning star disappear. He pulled me close to him, kissed my forehead and I inhaled he's musky scent one last time because I knew this would be the very last time with my could be star under the stars.

You see Mr performer is married and has a child of 4 months, would you let your emotions get in the way, lost love rekindled, well at least I have the song to hold on too.

Miss Di

CMON' WE DONT DO THIS ANYMORE!!!

I had a good laugh over the weekend when I went for my home coming, I met with people from my past and hung out with new friends.

The amusing thing is that women haven't changed and the issues are still the same. As a woman in her 30's I would suggest some of these pointers:

IF ITS BROKEN DONT TRY AND FIX IT.

We tend to go back to our exes, spend tonnes of energy thinking about our past relationship and still get into a relationship with someone similar to your ex, is it the men? hell no its you, get off your butt and know that your standards must change. I spent so many sleepless night and mornings wishing for someone to come back and he never did because he had moved on and I was still clinging, how stupid I feel thinking about that mess.

I GOT SO WASTED LAST NIGHT


That is a hot mess for a woman my age to say, I get headaches from drinking just three bottles of beer, as for wine, my second glass I become rubbery in the mouth. It was fun when I could down a whole bottle of liquor and loss my senses but try being elegantly drunk and not flirting with the waiter or any random person... not my thing anymore

CAN WE JUST BE FRIENDS
 
Yeah, im sure ladies you heard that one line, a guy just wants to be friends......please, tell me where a guy and a chick have been just friends????? I have tried it too many times and its awkward, dinner, drinks, a movie at  he's place, a gentle touch on your back, holding hands as pals, the accidental brush of your lips when intoxicated, please we know where that is heading.

FACE BOOK ISN'T REAL


I would like to read a post that say this, im having such a hard time lately, I cant make my bills, I have an infection and I cant figure out who gave it to me, my kids drive me up the wall I could slap that little thing and I just cant sleep without a drink.

I instead we have happy pictures of a wonderful family, life, a fulfilling experience. well people will like just coz its cute and no one really cares after the like button, find a real person and have real conversations

HOMECOMING SATISFACTION


Ladies, in this day and age get it any way that you can. There is no reason for you to be walking the streets unsatisfied. There are plenty of men out there who can give you the satisfaction you deserve. Don’t be shy, explore your sexuality, it’s the only way you’re going to grow fully but that protection is great to keep in your bag



SELFIES NAKED

I have always got guys asking me to take pics of my lady parts and send them, I normally ask the guy to stand in front of the mirror absolutely naked and send me the pic first then I can send mine to him, yeah if he has any respect for himself he would never ask for naked pics again. How silly are you to send a guy pics and not expect them to surface somewhere else, I remember I asked a guy to first send me he's, he went and downloaded an image and sent me someone else's and so I sent him someone else's lady parts, he's friend later told me how they had a laugh of the photo I sent, hmmm imagine if I was naive and sent  my selfies

Its a wrap!

Miss Di.

STRAIGHT FROM THE HEART

It doesn't hurt anymore and all the thoughts have disappeared.
There were nights I couldn't sleep
There were moments I woke up in tears
There were moments I would lay on you shirt and held on the scent of you
There were days I would hug the pillow and pretend that I was holding on to you
There were times I took a drink just to forget you
But now it doesn't hurt anymore

There were times I would just want to hear your voice
There were times I wanted to tell you how I would always love you
There were times I wish I could just see you close your eyes and watch you sleep
There were times I wish you could still make me mad
There were times I wish you would still make me laugh
But now it doesn't matter anymore

I have had my heart break before but this time it took a little longer

I learnt that only me can make me happy
Only me can make my day brighter always
Only me can get me up and be happy
Only me can put a smile on my face and brighten up my world
This is straight from my heart.

Miss Di